Hey lovely people! I greatly appreciate all the love you shared on my first blog – Divorce Didn’t Define
Before we go any further, I must let you know after my first marriage failed, finding love and getting married again was far from my thoughts. Rooming separately, but still living with my soon to be ex-husband at the time, was more than enough on my plate.
The Unknowing Connection
So, how did we meet? Well, I was heading to NYC with one of my besties on a girls trip. She knew it was a difficult time for me and thought a change of scenery was just what I needed. Hesitatingly, I went along. It was time to escape my reality and enjoy some time with my girls.
This was supposed to be a relaxing and fun trip but what’s happening here?Delays after delays and repeat. Delays from at the airport gate in Fort Lauderdale to delays on the runway. After minutes that turned into hours without exaggeration, finally we’re on our way. Relaxing until interrupted you wouldn’t guess. The pilot announced an issue that caused yet again another delay.
That was when the Mister stood up to pack away his jacket in the overhead cabin. Those arms stood out alright! “What are you doing, you’re not divorced yet so don’t go eyeing anyone” I’m thinking to myself. He must have heard my thoughts or felt my eyes ripping through his shirt. He turned around and our eyes made four. All I could do was blush. Oh my goodness how embarrassed I felt
So, as if all the delays weren’t enough, we were instructed to deplane at the nearest airport, Baltimore for a quick fuel tap up. Not so perfect opportunity for the Mister to head over and introduce himself. Oh Lord help me, can we get to New York already! The Mister was polite and sociable but I had no interest to chit chat. The bestie, on the other hand, spokesperson of the day, felt the very need to announce. “You guys have so much in common and should keep in touch.” Thanks, but no thanks I screamed in my head. Business cards were exchanged and of course I felt I had to go along being the polite person that I am. Finally, the boarding announcement and we’re off to NYC!
Letting Go
Back to reality! My situation grew complicated and the direction of my life shifted. I was told to move out since I wasn’t paying any bills. Not surprised, as I’d heard it before, I knew it was time to escape the physical, emotional and financial abuse. I felt scared, not knowing my next move just outright lost and weak. Thankfully I had the support of friends who allowed me to go back and forth from their homes. There were also nights I slept in my car, and it was during those times, my lowest times, that it became clear. This was bigger than me and I couldn’t do it on my own. I had to seek God, and pray
You, Lord, are the light that keeps me safe. I am not afraid of anyone. You protect me, and I have no fears.
Psalms 27:1
It started by tossing all shame and pride to the side. I shared everything, my struggles, complicated living situation and my daughter with my new Mister who became my new friend. Showing my vulnerable side and sharing my weaknesses was hard but it got easier. Ironically, he had been divorced too which made it so easy for us to lean on each other. Then the unthinkable happened.
Let God
He offered us a place to stay and turned his house into a home for my daughter and I. He committed to being our support in every way. Thank you Jesus! This was too good to be true. That’s when it hit me. This was the reason for those delays on that trip months earlier. Overwhelmed with emotions and decisions to make with not much time I had to pay attention. Remember I prayed for God to step in and then this happened. This was God doing His work. I realized my hardship was apart of the process to prepare me for my blessing. I trusted God’s direction, stepped out in faith and accepted my blessing.
The Lord is my strength and my shield. I trust him with all my heart.
Psalm 28:7
Moving into another man’s residence with my daughter was oh so strange but yet comfortable. We literally took things one day at a time supporting each other. The focus was mainly to make the transition comfortable for myself but mostly my baby girl. Our bond got stronger everyday and I learned to love again. Months later when he surprisingly proposed…I said YES! We celebrated our union with close family and friends enjoying an intimate beach wedding ceremony. Days later we sealed the union by baptizing together and making God the center of our marriage.
There you have it… Finding love and marriage the second time around was an unforgettable journey. God still performs miracles y’all. You just read one. I pray for at least one heart to be inspired by my testimony. Your situation may be out of your hands but God has a better plan for your life. Be strong and encouraged and know that you are never alone. God loves you!
One Love,
Mommi Roxi
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Roxanne McKoy
April 2, 2019 10:47 amRox, I cried all over again. Rob is an obvious God ordained blessing and as I would have said before we don’t know the reason for our struggles but had you not endured what you did you would not embrace this blessing with the same gratitude.
God is just incredibly awesome. “Love unnu nuff and plentiful!!”
Roxanne Cowans
April 6, 2019 10:26 pmRoxanne, He truly is and you said it perfectly. God sure is good all the time! Thanks for your love and support during my journey and thank you for taking the time to read and share your heart warming comment. I’m blessed to have such a great friend. Nuff love right back at yah!
Sash
April 2, 2019 6:46 pmLoving someone selflessly and watching them turn cold and bitter is so discouraging. Sometimes God is pushing us away from what we WANT to show us what we NEED! This was a good read; and undoubtedly a ray of hope for heartbroken hearts everywhere!
Thanks for sharing!
Roxanne Cowans
April 6, 2019 10:34 pmSash, it was very difficult to experience that bitterness but letting go and letting God mended my heart. Thank you so much for the time to read and share your comments. I appreciate your encouraging words. Blessings!
Princess-Najuma
April 4, 2019 10:18 amGirl!!!!!! This is a story that will never get old… I smiled , laughed and almost cried at the hard parts but God knows it all girl he is Big enough for anything we face! I’m super proud of you!
Roxanne Cowans
April 6, 2019 10:47 pmPrincess, absolutely there’s nothing that God cannot do. My faith in God was strengthened after this experience. Thank you girl for reading and commenting. I appreciate all the love and support! Nuff love…Blessings!
Tyffani Clarke
April 16, 2019 10:11 pmI am truly happy for you.