Tomorrow marks my second official Mother’s Day, and I couldn’t be more ecstatic. Growing up, I saw Mother’s Day strictly as being a day to shower Mom with gifts, nothing more nothing less; I say nothing less literally because I know growing up if we didn’t get my mom a gift there would have been a problem. Now that I’m a mom myself I see it so differently.


Last year, at work I overheard some older ladies talking about what they wanted for Mother’s Day, a woman replied, “I just want a day to myself, I want my husband to take the kids out… I want to take a bath, enjoy a glass of wine, and just rest”. The woman next to her couldn’t agree more. Foolish of me as I approached my first Mother’s Day, I thought, “that’s it”? As much as I wished I could say my husband, I thought to myself, “My baby’s father better go all out, I know he has a brunch planned, followed by a spa day”… I literally had this elaborate day planned with Bill Gates’ bank account. I just knew it was going to be big— it had to be. The day finally came, and it was in fact big I was showered with gifts, and flowers followed by a wine tasting, and a picnic. (Told y’all I’m really the wine drinking mom). He knew me all too well because the day was everything.


Fast forward to this year, … is it me or did Mother’s Day come quick as hell? The highly anticipated holiday rolled around quick as ever and I’m surprisingly quite unprepared. The major things have suddenly became minor, and the pressing question, ‘What do you want for Mothers Day’? Isn’t so pressing. I’m content with anything … honestly. I’ve found gratitude in being able to become a mother, of course outside appreciation any day is nice … but me I’m grateful to just be a part of Mother’s Day.

Last year I just about wanted a new house, a new car , and a new purse; and this year much like many other seasoned moms, I’m happy with just a little time for myself. Ever since social media, it’s become almost normal to become envious of people … many won’t admit it but I can. I’ve watched over years as mothers have celebrated this one special day being spoiled and I was envious. “I can’t wait until I have kids, my Mothers Days’ are going to be lit”, I convinced myself.  It never dawned on me that there were women who would give anything to celebrate a Mother’s Day and unfortunately cannot, I bet them just being able to conceive would bring more joy than any present could. —so many things we take for granted.

Any time I’m out here living life like a wannabe celebrity I have to ground myself and reel it back in… those romantic ass helicopter rides followed by a perfect dinner doesn’t always happen, and that’s okay. 

Gentle reminder, being a mother should always remind us that we are blessed beyond measure. If you feel yourself down because your Mother’s Day isn’t quite living up to expectations remind yourself there are women out there who can’t conceive. Another gentle reminder, Be grateful for what you do have.

*cues Beyoncé* “Who run this muutthhhaa?”

With that said, Happy Mother’s Day to all, even the ones who aren’t “official”

Mommi Ashley